Just Be

I remember when I was a child, creativity came fairly easily.  Pretending to be movie stars or setting up an entire scenario and scenery around a Barbie doll, complete with aluminum pans of water with Lantana flowers thrown in as if Barbie were in Hawaii.  I also loved making colorful pot holders and selling them door to door.  As a little girl, I even loved making creepy crawlys with the little heater plate that came with it and creating colorful bugs with the goop.

Eventually, adulthood catches up and you have to concern yourself with making a living and exploring other areas of your life that need attention.  Then a day comes when you ask yourself, what is missing in my life that is causing this angst I feel?  For me, it is creating something pretty even in for my own eyes.  I just want to create something nice.

I have watched video after video in fast motion of art journaling trying to catch every move they make.  I have copied and have become discouraged that is doesn't look as nice as theirs.  But I have discovered that continued learning eventually gives way to the ability to put it together.  I thought this page was a mess and had no clue how to finish it up.  It comes to me that if I can't draw, I can do the next best thing and use the pretty items from craft stores.  Do what you love.  I love all the amazing emphera that is available and though it isn't my art, it is definitely fun to design with it.

Confident

I have been challenged by a lack of confidence my entire life.  It is crippling at times.  I had hoped getting older would bring on new confidence as many women have claimed they received as they turned 40 or 50.  Wonderful for them.  Mine comes and goes.  As a Christian, I'd like to stand on the faith that Jesus stood.  Now I enter into a another world I watched my parents go through with little understanding what it was like for them.  I am only 57 and was blessed with excellent health.  I still have excellent health but am beginning to realize the onset of the aging body thing.  And yes, it frightens me.  I just discovered visual journaling and now face challenges with my eyesight.  Nothing debilitating but enough to remind me of how very fragile we human creatures are.  We are wonderfully made, no question, but we are mortal and living in a decaying body until we are set free from those bodies.  So, what confidence I muster up comes from my heavenly father.  His still small voice always says to me "lift up your head" as if to remind me who I am in Christ.  That love alone should always be my foundation.

Chasing Rainbows

A Poem I wrote and Art Journaling Around It

A poem I did a long time ago.  I was chasing a rainbow - running after someone who never loved me.  I would frequently give up time to be with my mom to chase a dream.  My poem was published in Center Stage in the 80's, Central Florida's Art and Entertainment Magazine at the time.  This journal page needs something....not sure what yet.

I just had to share this photo.  My tabby, Sugar sleeping.  Always makes me giggle how she hides her face.  Sometimes animals are so human like.

I was just thinking about the days as a young girl and teenager living around some pretty phenominal woods and lakes.  I think about how blessed I was to enjoy the sounds of nature that I no longer hear today.  In the sixties and most of the seventies, we did not have air conditioning.  Our homes and cars did not come with them.  We slept with our windows open and the box fans blowing.  Every night I would hear the whipporwill calling and the voice would echo across the lake among the woods.  It was a magical and mysterious call that absolutely excited us kids to hear because the bird was never seen.  The call always reminded me of the warm summer nights we kids spend talking on the streets of our neighborhood and then slipped into late night girl talks while stopping in silence to hear that bird's beautiful voice.

Another bird we use to see and hear during the day was the Bob White.  It would march along the sandy scrub brush behind our homes singing out its name in a whistle.  We were so young, but how we appreciated the nature that walked beside us on a daily basis.  We had not only those amazing birds, but gopher turtles that burrowed just behind our house that we used to feed lettuce to.  There were owls that perched on the lamp posts, rabbits scuttling about, and there were many a Florida panther in that area.

Today, I do not hear the Whipporwill or the Bob White.  I am blessed to hear a Cardinal or a Mocking Bird every  now and then.  I miss the sounds of nature.  Calming and soothing, a reminder of our Creator and everything brilliant and substantial that He made.  Those birds always sang praises to their Maker.  Every morning and or night depending upon your make and model, the shrills of voices doing what they were made to do, singing their little hearts out no matter what was going on in the world.  Sweet music.